Sunday, June 15, 2008

Yet another Top Ten list ...

... and this one continues the theme of clergy-musician relationship.

This time, these are two separate lists that Douglas Cowling had compiled. These were nicked off the Anglican-Music listserv.

TOP TEN WORST THINGS CLERGY HAVE DONE

1. Refusing to plan ahead (I can't spell Christmas in July)

2. Failing to take musicians into confidence during planning stage

3. Announcing during the sermon that 3 verses of a hymn which had been arranged for orchestra would be omitted due to lack of time.

4. Making the service his personal worship experience with added personal prayers

5. Announcing without warning a hymn replacing the prepared anthem

6. Not allowing Latin because "I don't understand it."

7. Shouting announcements over the organist's introduction to a hymn

8. Insisting on prerogatives to mask defensive insecurity about music

9. Announcing to choir that someone will be making a report instead of the anthem

10. Altering the order of the service or adding extras without prior warning.

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If you think Mr. Cowling is letting his fellow musicians off the hook, you have another thing coming. So, fellow church musicians - are you ready for a good-natured roasting?

TOP TEN WORST THINGS MUSICIANS HAVE DONE

1. Arriving drunk on Christmas Eve, then leaving before the service, saying, "No one will care if it's a service without any music."

2. Disputing the priest's canonical oversight of the liturgy at a public meeting.

3. Stopping the eucharistic prayer and starting a choir piece which had been omitted accidentally earlier in the service

4. Refusing to engage in a performance review because "no one is qualified to judge me."

5. Improvising unexpectedly on an instrument while the priest is reading a prayer

6. Refusing to come to worship committee meetings

7. Raising an umbrella at the organ console during a baptismal renewal sprinkling

8. Tuning a guitar during the sermon

9. Always looking for ways to insert extra choir music into the liturgy

10. Pretending not to have the music at the organ for something the musicians didn't like.

4 comments:

Sara said...

Ohmylord. This is all so awesome. Hilarious.

Lyn F. said...

Isn't it? It was too good to keep to myself! :-)

I hope all is well in Tryon ...

Scelata said...

Fantastic!
But not, alas, unbelievable...

(Save the Liturgy, Save the World)

Charles said...

Okay, Lyn, mines up at m' blog.